16 Jan Momspiration Monday // Roxanne’s Story
Finding time to write my story about motherhood has been almost as easy as winning the lottery. Non-stop days with never enough time in them, is the story of every mother’s life. Working moms, stay-at-home moms, moms of 1, 2, 3, or 10…..we are all on the same journey to find that perfect balance. That balance of being fulfilled as a good mother without feeling drained in all other aspects of our lives. My journey into motherhood started out with lofty goals.
I had dreams of being a mom by 30, having 4 kids by 35, and handling it all with perfect poise while working as a full-time Ob/Gyn at a busy Dallas private practice. Through 4 years of infertility and an adoption that fell through the day of the baby’s delivery, I soon learned more about living in the present than planning for the future. My time for being a mom finally came, and I would not change the lessons and gratitude I gleaned from those years for anything.
Living in the present is something that, as a mother, I make the priority in my day. In the morning, before the sun has risen, I sit down and devote time to remembering what is important. It is not to-do lists or future anxieties, it is today’s memories and moments- and I choose how I react to challenges that may come. I have learned patience and stress-release in my 15 months of being a mother. It is so hard with all the anxieties of this world, all the pressures put on mothers these days, to fall into expectations of motherhood. The expectations that I should have a happy child all the time, that he should be in the 90th percentile for height and weight, that he should eat organics, that he shouldn’t play on the iPhone before age 2, that I should want more than one, that I should look like I have my life perfectly together on social media. Gideon gets frustrated, the iPhone has saved many restaurant meals from ending prematurely, I have fallen asleep with makeup on more times than I can remember, and as much as I try to make time everyday to cook for Gideon and my family- I’m not ashamed to say he eats pizza or carryout at least once a week.
My goals for being a mother are to have a sane household. I want to always be a committed doctor, a volunteer in my community, a 50/50 partner in my marriage, and a reliable friend. Keeping my anxieties about motherhood at arms length and my focus on the here and now, is how I balance all of these roles and am able to close my eyes- perhaps still with eye makeup on- at the end of the day knowing that, maybe it wasn’t a perfect day, but it was a day spent fulfilled.
Roxanne Pero is a 37-year old wife and mother living in Dallas, TX. She is an Ob/Gyn by day (and sometimes by night if she is on call), in a busy private practice at Presbyterian of Dallas. She enjoys spending time with her family and friends, volunteering, and finding time for live music when her son Gideon will allow date nights.
Do you want to share your story of motherhood with others? Do you have a momspiration you’d like to nominate to share their story and encouragement? Email us at [email protected]!